I tell myself you’re convenient because saying otherwise would kill me

I keep coming back to you
Even as you hurt me
Again and again

What a vicious circle of dependence and betrayal and craving and self destruction and addiction

I crawl on my knees
Because I’ve fallen in every sense of the word
And I beg you to take me back

I’m a junkie honestly
And the worst kind
But don’t for once think it’s you I crave for
It’s the pain
I’m a masochist
And you’re convenient